Why does happiness so often elude us?
The basic answer is that we are conditioned to set our priorities according to others’ standards at a very young age. As these standards are narrated to us (subtly or overtly), our belief system about our worthiness and about what is possible begins to become contorted. The reason this process so thoroughly separates us from our innate ability to be happy is because every person on earth has one singular commonality - the birthright to be loved and valued and appreciated. When we are rejected, abused, judged, ignored, criticized, or neglected, our instincts to win back love kicks in. Why? Because we deserve to be loved.
You can spend decades revisiting your past to determine where you separated from happiness, but all you’re really doing is postponing your happiness again. The analysis and resultant comprehension can be quick: it need not be an endless undertaking. You can BUILD happiness beginning any moment in your life, real, sustainable, true happiness.
I know because I did it. And then I taught thousands of others how to achieve it.
From this overflowing abundance of knowing how it feels to be happy on a regular basis, I am continually inspired to help others to feel this way. Happiness can be learned. And you can learn it. Although I poured four years plus a vast amount of suggestions and exercises into my online course to teach happiness (Happyin90.com - Guaranteed!), I’d like to summarize seven essential points to jumpstart your success.
1. Accept that you are capable of perpetual happiness.
The reason that the self-help industry earns billions is because most people want insights into becoming happy, but they don’t really know how to integrate them. Our state of being is relatively habitual. We live within a vibrational range of experiences and emotions that magnetically pull us back to the same state over and over again. The first step in elevating this range is to believe that you are capable of elevating this range.
2. Understand that there is no one path to happiness.
Whether information is coming from a guru, master, enlightened one, shyster, convert, or religion, each will tout the merits of their version of the path. Is there any ONE that is 100% the right path for everyone? Absolutely not. Is there one that absolutely brings forth incontrovertible universal wisdom? No.
The best wisdom out there is information that ignites your love of self and encourages independent thinking.
3. Believe that, regardless of your background, you can reconnect to your happiness birthright right now.
We all have highly unique journeys. Some are more painful than others, and some leave more scars than others. Your journey is specific to you. It was co-created (by you, the universe, your guides) to give the best possibility of igniting your true, limitless power. You CAN cut the cord that a painful past has over you when you are willing to accept that you can.
4. Comprehension is liberating.
Understanding your past has value, not to blame anyone or to stay within the vibration of the past, but rather to help you understand how you separated, to some level, from your innate happiness. Until you make that link, it’s understandable that you would feel responsible for your own unhappiness. You are not responsible for what happened that separated you from your best path, but you are responsible for your choices from this second on.
5. Quiet your mind.
Meditating is not the only way, so don’t give up if that’s not your pleasure. Know though, it is essential to quiet your mind on a regular basis. That’s how you cut through the sludge you have been taught. I’m happy to intuitively help you find the best methods for you to quiet your mind. My intuition is limitless and acts as your shortcut.
6. Honor your intuition.
While a quiet mind is the surest pathway to intuit information, valuing and growing your intuition in any and every way possible will immensely contribute to your happiness. If you’d like a boost, attend my events, watch my videos, and read my books and essays.
7. Give yourself permission to have fun and to play.
Although we are largely conditioned to be hyper-responsible, fearful, and over-scheduled, our happiness abounds when we allow ourselves to live in awe and playfulness. We are entitled to be free of worry.
You have one shot at this specific lifetime. Why not choose to be bursting with happiness during it?
As a conduit to guides, I can attune to information that is valuable, timeless, and inspirational. It consistently cuts through the haze of human amnesia and allow us to remember that which we have forgotten - that which we knew before we were born.
In order to help you continue to tap into your own soul’s wisdom, I have channeled a message from your guide. The message is worth remembering:
From Your Forever Guide With Love:
I guide you from the moment you awaken, until the moment you go to sleep. I guide you from the moment you were born, until the moment that you die. I never separate from you. My guidance is in your strength; it’s within your wisdom, and it’s within your knowingness. It’s within your mistakes; it’s within what you see as your shortcomings. My guidance is there when you sleep. My guidance is there in my love for you. Often, your lowest moments are the times that you feel me, and know me, and see me, and sense me the most. I never, ever separate or disappear from your life. In the happy times, and not so happy times, I am there by your side. I may seem energetically more significant to you when you are feeling unhappy, or disempowered, or sad, because it is important that you know how loved you are, and how much I will never ever, ever, ever leave you, that I am by your side, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
Sometimes when you are feeling the most happy, and the most ecstasy and bliss in your own happiness, when you feel those celebratory moments, you can also sense my being there with you, celebrating, throwing confetti, helping you ride the wave of goodness of what it feels like to be the soul that you really are. I have shared all of these moments with you, and I will always have these shared experiences with you. My goal is to have more of those celebratory moments with you, and fewer of those pained moments, because I want you to remember and re-experience what it is like to be a pure soul without any human encumbrances.
Let this guidance in. You are never alone. The greatest peace came to me in my own journey when I remembered this truth. Please remember it for yourself, too, and enjoy all the powerful signs, support, tenderness, happy prods, and wisdom it provides. Enjoy your guides; you have many and they all feel the same way - they want you to know them and they will always be there for you.
If you think about your worst childhood moments, there is a vibration associated with that experience. Think about it. You can almost feel the body’s reaction. It’s as if your cells hole up in steel containers, just trying to protect themselves from the happenings. You may remember a mixture of alertness, avoidance, resistance, fear, anger, helplessness, or confusion - a toxic cocktail that destroys harmony. Whether you experienced that dreadful vibration once, twice, or many times throughout childhood, on some level of consciousness you remember that vibration.
The more often you returned to that vibration as a child, the more likely you are to return to that vibration as an adult. You do not necessarily recreate the exact experiences, but you duplicate the effect of the experience.
As I observe clients on the brink of increased happiness, I also observe self-sabotage that accompanies the new joy. It’s as if the body continually attempts to echo that familiar vibration of childhood. The new level of contentment is unfamiliar, therefore, the client has no paradigm for how to live to that level.
Hard to believe, but true! It’s difficult for us to accept, and live in, new levels of happiness. The process takes time, focus, and determination.
To step into that new energy space and stay there, certain fundamental changes can pave the way:
1. Believe that you have the right to live there. Believe that you have the birthright to happiness, fulfillment, joy, love, and abundance. There is nothing that you have ever done, or not done, that removes that birthright.
2. Fundamentally work toward increasing your love of self. Self-love is the foundation for all success. The book, Begin Here, is a great start.
3. Envision yourself being happier. Take the time to imagine what that looks like, feels like, and sounds like.
4. Find ways to enjoy peace without volatility. Oddly, some “bodies” find peace boring, therefore, they unconsciously shake things up and invite in drama. The drama contains an energy reminiscent of the vibration of childhood chaos.
5. Reset your reference point. Establish goals that are based on achieving peace and abundance, then celebrate their achievement.
6. Discover new ways to get your pulse pumping. Repeatedly revisiting the vibrations of fear, disempowerment, and anger give the body a “surge.” That surge can accidentally be linked with feeling alive. In order to actively choose a happier vibration, you want to reconnect “the links” by associating a surge with healthy stimuli. Some examples might be decidedly helping others and getting a rush from their successes, physical adventures or exercise, creating something, public speaking, trying something new that takes courage, etc.
7. Recruit a happiness buddy. Swap encouragements. Use each other to celebrate living in a higher vibration, and use each other as support allies when the lure of the old vibration is compelling. Let your buddy guide you past old powerful, self-defeating habits.
8. Our journey here on earth is to continually seek a return to the vibrational energy of love, from which we are each derived. The earth realm has complex vehicles that make navigating our way back to that vibration very difficult but, ultimately, we each make our way there - maybe not in this lifetime, but at some point. Make it easier on yourself to get there by setting that phenomenal, blissful vibration as your destination.
You can do it. I believe in you. You deserve to be happy. When you step into new levels of happiness, agree with me by staying there :-)
Recently, someone asked me why I never use the word “God” in my writings, coaching, and presentations. He was right. I don’t.
When I started this journey of openly sharing what I “get” through my conduit to universal knowledge, there were a few decisions I made about how / what I would convey. I stick to those guidelines as best as I can:
- Keep busting myths. There are so many myths about right/wrong, life/death, or good/bad. These myths tether us. They bind and limit our ability to be free and to uncover or improve our own conduits to truth.
- Don’t use any religious terms. Everyone has history. Our perspective is based on how information was presented to us, and also based on how aligned with love our childhood experiences were. Religion, therefore, is a very personal matter and words that we throw around as if they only contain one meaning can be, in fact, used or interpreted with very different meaning based on one’s upbringing.
- Do my best to provide new positive possibilities to empower people.
- Keep my conduit as unencumbered as possible. If the information that I get from non-physical sources or through my visits to the energy realm are filtered through personal biases, then the information may not be of great value to audiences or clients.
Now back to the term, God. The specific reason I don’t use the term is that there are a large variety of interpretations about what God means. For some, God is a benevolent old man who is our creator and represents love. For others, God is an omniscient male figure that determines our fate, including doling out punishment and rewards. Others turn to God as their source of comfort and strength. Some see God as the ultimate judge of right or wrong, dictating specific actions that a person must take or must not take to win his favor. The point is that there is not one agreed upon version of what or who God is. Therefore, my preference is to use terms such as “all that is” or “the universe” to describe this source, terms which can dissolve limited associations that many make with the term God.
From my “consciousness travels,” here’s my version of God:
God is neither male nor female in energy. God is love. God is creation. God is eternal. God is original consciousness. God is existence itself. God is the universe.
As I see it, love expands. Every soul, every human, every bit of everything is an extension of that expansion. Picture a beautiful ball of energy, radiating and expanding, sending sparks of itself into existence. We are those sparks. We contain all of the infinite knowingness of our original source. The journey of the soul is to recall it all. It is to reconnect with our ability to vibrate at the purest vibration of love.
Since we are each sparks of God, then we are each God. God, therefore, is you and me. We are all connected, on earth and eternally. We are love. We are each infinite and powerful. The idea of separateness creates all of the chaos that we see or experience on earth. When we remember that we are love, when we remember that we are original source, when we remember that we are God, then limits fade. Truth emerges. The process doesn’t happen in one second. It occurs as an evolution through the journey of our souls. And our ability to recall this truth is a testament to the power of love.
When we recall that we are God, we let go of the idea that we are less than. We are not less than. We are everything.
When we recall that we are God, we let go of the idea that some are better than others. No one is superior to another. Their lives just play out differently based on the specific equation of their childhoods, coupled with how far along the soul’s journey they are in their travels back to the pure vibration of love.
When we recall that we are God, we let go of the idea that some force controls our destiny. We recognize that we co-create our journey with and within all aspects of existence.
When we recall that we are God, we realize that we are powerful and we become stalwart in not handing away our power.
When we recall that we are God, we remember how joyful life is and we remember the peace and happiness that are within each of us.
When we recall that we are God, we move from living as encumbered humans to living as free souls.
If we are God, does that mean that we don’t have support, a higher power, or a source of unconditional love to guide us? Does that mean that you have to be one hundred percent self-reliant? No. One of the most interesting discoveries that I make while in the energy realm (think a near-death experience without the trauma to get there) is that two apparently contrasting ideas do not actually negate each other. One of those ideas is that we are one and we are distinct. We do not need to be one or the other. As such, we are God, yet God is also a distinct consciousness. When we turn to God for support or understanding, therefore, we are igniting the God within us as the conduit to connect with God-consciousness. An amazing miracle about human life is that we are never alone. We are always supported and guided and even protected. In the process of remembering that we are God, we are recollecting that the infinite power of God is in us, near us, with us, and for us. Realizing that power unlocks our individual power.
Even after writing this essay, you will still not hear me use the term “God,” unless your guides specifically suggest that I use that term with you. That indicates that your guides know your interpretation of the term matches what your guides intend it to mean when they say God.
The bottom line is that you are as important as everything, and everything is as important as you. Since God knows this to be true, that means you know this to be true, also :-)
I often say that the animal kingdom is a lot smarter than the human species. We have a lot to learn. Let’s take a peek.
Animals trust their instincts. Call it inner guidance, innate intelligence, or intuition, animals don’t talk themselves out of pushes and pulls.
They don’t get into an elevator with someone who gives them a psychopath vibe.
Animals don’t let guilt rule their lives.
They peacefully co-exist among vast variety.
They’re adaptable. Did you know that the arctic fox’s fur turns brown in the summer?
They are super eco-friendly.
When animals discover a problem, they immediately seek a solution.
They don’t gossip.
Animals don't waste.
They wake up happy.
Animals don’t think they look fat. Did you know that a blue whale weighs approximately the same as 30 elephants?
Animals don’t dial down their potentiality by thinking that they’re not good enough.
Animals don’t worry.
Most animals don’t go gray as they age.
Animals teach and model, but they don’t make silly rules.
They don’t get all hung-up about sexual orientation, monogamy, or gender identification. Did you know that oysters can change their gender multiple times throughout their lives?
They don’t care about religion.
They connect through consciousness.
Animals don’t kill for the furs they wear.
They eat when they’re hungry. A tarantula can go over two years without food.
Animals sleep when they’re tired. Did you know that a giraffe typically only sleeps an average of a half-hour per day?
Animals don’t do for others that which others can do for themselves.
They don’t fret over parenting roles. In some species the moms stay home with the kids, and in others, the dad. Likewise, sometimes the females dominantly hunt, and others, the males. None do laundry.
Animals don’t let guilt rule their lives. Did I state that one already? Yeah.
Animals don’t over-complicate everything.
Animals don’t think they’re superior to everything on the planet.
Animals live respecting the vast symbiotic relationships among the planet, and the animal and plant communities.
Okay … so honestly, I like some animals more than some people, and some people more than some animals. But what I really like is animals and people who live in honor of everything.